Recently in Funnies Category

With the international break forcing inactivity in some quarters, there has been time for certain issues that have been simmering to bubble over.

A recent contretemps between two senior Everton staff has recently been brought to our notice. An account follows.

The scene is in David Moyes' office. Bill Kenwright is also present.

LOT TO LIVE UP TO

EVERTON today return to the scene of one of their most memorable weeks of last season - when they won at Upton Park twice in four days to secure a place in the Carling Cup semi-finals and three Premier League points.

But it wasn't that particular week in December that shaped the season, it was the two-month unbeaten run that it helped along that had far more significance.

SEVERAL members of Everton's first team were among the celebrities walking the red carpet at the MTV European Music Awards.

Joleon Lescott, Tim Howard, Carlo Nash, James Vaughan, Victor Anichebe, Leon Osman and Nuno Valente were all snapped at the entrance of the awards, being held at the ECHO Arena, Liverpool.

Send us your thoughts below as to what they might have made of it all

Mikel Arteta was also there with his partner (pictured below)

By James Pearce

Your guide to the derby day cliches guaranteed to get an airing this weekend.

1. 'The formbook goes out of the window'

2. 'It will be played at 100 miles an hour'

3. 'Bragging rights are up for grabs'

... and there I was, casually looking around eBay in vain for a lock of Mikel Arteta's beautiful hair, when I came across our most desperate bid for transfer funds yet.

It's that time again.

Above are some of the Everton squad getting into the spirit of things when it was Beatles Day earlier this month.

Send us your witticisms below

TIME for another caption competition.

Here are Blues 80s legends Andy Gray and Derek Mountfield

Send us your witticisms by leaving a comment below..

DAVID MOYES has apparently given the names of 24 transfer targets to the Everton board, almost like one of those lists of gifts that brides-to-be distribute to their wedding guests.

To mark the start of the silly season, Everton Banter has created a section called Funnies, which we hope will become home to the funniest football-related web jokes out there.

If you have one, send it to us at makethenews@dailypost.co.uk and we'll add it Funnies - we'll even tell everyone who it came from.

We'll also start doing regular caption competitions - honour and glory for the best.

We start with a gentle dig at Chelsea captain John Terry